What I learned about alien invasions from Hollywood

We are not alone in the universe; the truth is out there.

Out of all the planets in the universe, aliens will come to Earth first.
Earth is a magnet for alien invasions.

Aliens will always target Los Angeles or New York City first, so it’s safer to live in more obscure areas of the country like Fayetteville, NC; Sparks, NV; Killeen, TX; Miami, FL; or anywhere in Europe and Asia.

Aliens look just like us, but they don’t really. If you have these special glasses, you can see their true form.

Aliens don’t really come in peace. They come to destroy all life on earth so they can re-colonize it.

The military is involved in a cover-up conspiracy involving the existence of UFOs because anyone non-military “can’t handle the truth.”

There will always be one alien who falls in love with a human, fathers a half-breed child and helps the humans.

The military and all its high tech weapons will be useless against the aliens.

It's our fault that aliens even know about our planet, what with sending out messages via frequency modulated radio waves in hopes of starting a conversation with them. Well, all we've done is alert them to our advancing technology and planetary resources.

Only one person can save the world in the event of an alien invasion and it won’t be you. He will be a single dad, widower or a soon-to-be-retired military dude.

That said, if you happen to meet one, you have a 50/50 chance of surviving the invasion.

English is the intergalactic language and all aliens are fluent.

Water, a baseball bat and a cold virus are useful in defending yourself in case of an alien encounter. If you own a MAC and are proficient in computer programming/hacking, you can defeat alien technology. If you have the flu, sneeze or cough on them.

Aliens are only teaching earthlings a lesson for slowly destroying the Earth by totally annihilating the planet and population in a few days.

Alien abductions are real and they are traumatizing – if you can remember them.

If the military compiled a list of all the alien invasion movies and conducted an extensive study of the footage of all the different scenarios of an attack, it may have a chance at thwarting an invasion.

That said, alien scouts have already been sent ahead to infiltrate, learn and report back to the mothership/planet and will no doubt have access to that information so their leaders can form alternate attack plans.

In the end, aliens will attack and destroy everything on Earth, but the human race will eventually win and have to start over.

If you play video games, you can easily pilot an alien ship and even figure out their weapon systems.